They don't realize just how damaging their behavior is to the relationship, and to our self-esteem. It will take time for my trust to fully come back, but it will I believe. Not being transparent I believe is one of the key reasons why I think we weren't able to make it work. Anyhow, i am know here for my kids. I just really need some support right now and I feel so alone. I never got that second chance. At that level exists the emotions, and they are the hurt, betrayal ones; not good.
I had cheated on my wife. I want to improve myself so I don't do this again to her but, need this last chance to prove it to her. But what you love is the comfort, convenience and security that you get from him being there. I want to keep our family intact. I couldn't really see an end to my behaviour. The thought of cheating had never even crossed my mind even with the dozens of men approaching me at work and other places.
The other woman is nice, she knows just what she needs to do. There is a line to be drawn, and there is only so much a person can take. I barely laid my head down the next morning when he landed in the middle of me yelling Iwas already causing trouble and my wife was there. Look at phone bills, phone calls for months. I have got through the worst of it but the guilt of what i did to a woman I still deeply love is haunting me. She convenient me to move in to my home which I own.
I still love her and likely always will in some capacity. I also needed him to keep pursuing me to show that he really wanted me back. The person who made a life long commitment to be my closest allie, is the one who betrayed and hurt me more than I could imagine. What you did was beyond bad. I found most of this affair on her computer. We shut down emotionally, for our own sanity, for our own survival.
However, I can promise you that this risk will be well worth it in the end. I know she has a good heart and I love this woman and I'm also ready to forgive but things have been so corrupted and distorted that I don't know if it's worth it. We argue over little stuff. If she decides to give you another chance, she will let you know. It is very demeaning, like we should be appreciative. We are emotionally involved on every level. Stacey confided that her previous boyfriends had always accused her of cheating.
What matters is that I broke my vows and hurt someone I loved very much in the process. I was hurt that she left that way and turned her phone off and I showed my hurt through anger. Your mistress owed your wife nothing. I believe that she is seriously hurt over the things I said in the fight I have no respect for her, regret marrying her, etc. Finding out your wife or girlfriend that you love is cheating on you is really one of the hardest things to deal with when you first suspect they are it can really screw you up trying to prove they are and eventually when you catch them out and confront them thats a real killer. I am glad you regret it and I am glad she won't take you back.
You have to give her awhile to decide what she wants and how she is going to forgive you. Of course I have the usual feelings and emotions I have read about such as the feeling of self worth, inadequcies, lost, angry, devastated. Her mother said i should meet her daughter as she was single again,she caught her husband cheating. After having an affair for a while, the new girl couldn't cope and I faced a decision. I needed to take responsibility and do it fast. I also did my 30 situps.
She has really crossed the line. If she can see that you are willing to work on these issues with a professional, she might be a little more perceptive. Time is just taking so long! Stay away from men until you are in a healthy place. But most importantly think of you and your kids first. Keep coming here to talk and vent as well. She swears that they are not physical? I hear all of that, but I don't know if that's the right thing to do? She sent herself all the emails and then left me 2 weeks ago. However, building a good is an important step to having a happy marriage.
Thank you all for sharing. Too many, it seemed I had it together. She loves you cause if she didnt she would have not accepted your daughter into the family knowing it will always reminds her of the cheating. She says she wants me back at home, she says that this was a very stupid mistake and that she loves me. Guess only time will tell. My wife a former D1 athlete took to my youngest sons hockey coach, he was 15-20 years older then her. But am i fool for even thinking of trying to keep this together.